A Mum Shares an Honest Post That Has Gone Viral About Motherhood and Anxiety
Motherhood is the hardest hood you’ll ever go through. So the saying goes.
The struggles are often hidden behind smiles, sunglasses and café lattes.
Motherhood can teach you how to put on a brave face and keep going. It can discipline you into learning how to keep up pretenses so no one can see you’re struggling inside.
But the reality is, most mums feel like they struggle with the day-to-day expectations placed on them the moment a baby is placed in their arms. Add a few extra siblings and she learns how to cope with the chaos rather than manage it.
If you add depression and anxiety to the already chaotic mix of motherhood, you have a mum who feels like she just can’t get her act together. And if we’re really honest, we all have times as mothers when we don’t put on our best show because exhaustion and stress take over.
But one mum wanted to put it straight on how she felt being judged as a mother who ‘has it altogether.’
Cierra Lyn Fortner, of Kansas City, Missouri, shared on Facebook an encounter she had with a cashier at Walmart. The mum to two boys aged nearly four and one shared some brave truths about her life and the post has gone viral because many mums resonate with her struggle.
Fortner’s post read:
Today I was at Walmart doing my weekly Friday shopping when the cashier says to me “I see you in here all the time, your kids are always dressed cute, behaving and you just seem to have it all together” at the time I just thanked her and giggled because that’s far from the truth but as I drove home there was more I wanted her to know about me.
I want her to know I battle a personality disorder everyday with anxiety and depression mixed and I’m a two times suicide survivor.
I want her to know that I can’t always get myself up off the couch to feed them anything more than frozen pizza and cereal.
I want her to know that my son is late for school 3 out of 4 days because I regularly forget what day and time it is, despite the toddler size calendar in my kitchen.
I want her to know I have those “I’m losing my shit” moments when I have to lock myself in the bathroom and cry.
I want her to know I wasn’t always the most active mom because I use to work 80 hours a week and go to school full time and Jayce spent many days and nights with his grandparents.
I want her to know that I hadn’t washed my hair in 3 days and my kids hadn’t had a bath in 2.
I want her to know that I was trying to hurry out of there because I had forgot the diaper bag at home and Brenton was hungry.
I want her to know that once we got to the parking lot the “well behaved” child decided to stand up in the cart and I wasn’t paying attention and barely caught him as he almost hit the concrete.
But most importantly I want her to know I don’t have it together and may never have it all together. I don’t know a mother out there that has it all together but everything we do is done with love for our children and that right there makes you the perfect mom and in our children’s eyes we most definitely have it all together.
From one exhausted mom to another, you’re doing great, have that melt down, let your kids eat the crap out of that cereal and take care of yourself always.
Mental health issues are so important to discuss and be honest about. Especially during motherhood. It’s not a sign of weakness, but a signal for ‘help.’
We often compare ourselves to other mums who look like they have their act together, but that small interaction at the school gate or in the mother’s room doesn’t reveal how the mum is really coping with life.
Every mum tries to do the best they can for their children. But sometimes it can feel as if it’s not enough.
But Cierra says it is enough. In our children’s eyes, we are more than enough.
And that truth is one all mums need to hear and believe.
What a heart touching story this is what an amzing woman you are Cierra … indeed there are no perfect mothers out there only mothers that dont always make the right decisions we are only human with human frailties motherhood does not come with an instruction manual when we become mothers just a feeling of unconditional love for our babies … I wish you all the best Cierra to you and your family